I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Randomize
