This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
All I want is dick and wine.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
