yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Randomize
