He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My bed smells like the plague
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
