I'm drive I can fine osifer
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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