We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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