on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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