Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
