we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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