Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
As shirtless as possible
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
