FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
where am i from again
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
