I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Randomize
