Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
She needs sedatives and a leash
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
