Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
