did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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