Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
