I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
