i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
