where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
