the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
