Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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