I think my fart just growled at me.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I came so hard my ears popped.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
