I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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