My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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