Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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