Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
