The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
