Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
