how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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