Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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