either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Dignity is for republicans.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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