apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
