Tell her she can't have a vagina
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
