The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
