I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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