you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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