if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
