I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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