He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I am available for nakedness
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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