You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
