what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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