Dual....:-)
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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