its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
