So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
