Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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