Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
