In the future we'll all be gay
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize