This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
