Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just saw a hot homeless man
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
