I wannas sexs uuuuu
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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