Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
