It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
